If a man is any man at all, his kids are the most important thing in the world to him. Equally important is his wife and the way he treats her in front of the children. In fact, setting this daily example of love – showering their mother with unconditional love – might be about the most important lesson you can teach.
Every man wants his child to be confident in life. It can be a gut-wrenching experience to watch our children struggle with self-doubt of any kind.
Psychologists claim that girls are usually more often affected than boys – but both can struggle with confidence while seeking out an identity.
Back on point – it all starts with how we treat their mom. While recognizing that many dads don’t have the opportunity to show their love to a significant other (divorce and death are a part of life), for those that do – take that love to a new level. Take advantage of your unique opportunity and show your children how a man gives love. Impress on them why it’s so important.
I recently laid my son down to sleep and as we were saying prayers, he added a few names to the list of people that God should bless – as he always does. But this time, he added something new to the end of the prayer – a “thank you for making Mommy so happy when Daddy bought her flowers”. I was at work so I didn’t get to see the response of my “for no reason at all” bouquet of roses, but my wife certainly showered me with a lot of extra love that evening and she was simply happy. More importantly though, my son noticed. He witnessed this act of kindness and it resonated with him – so much so that he included it in this prayer weeks later.
Mom and Dad are the entire world to toddlers. It’s worth remembering that the parental relationship kids witness will serve as the primary example for every future relationship they have. Want your kids to love others without hesitation? Want your son to treat girls with the love and respect they all deserve? Want your kids to be leaders with great strength and confidence? You’ve got to set that example first.
Every relationship is different with it’s own challenges. Some couples find it easy to always give love to each other. Other couples struggle to show love as the years go on.
It’s easy to lose sight of what’s important. It’s hard to get back to a place of unconditional love once you’ve left that behind.
Challenge yourself. Sit back for a bit and contemplate the overwhelming joy that you could create for yourself and all those around you by working to bring a soured relationship back to life. Imagine the surprise and joy your wife will feel by suddenly showering her with love and affection. Imagine the effects on your children as they see dad loving mom – and really love her; don’t just go through the motions.
If you’re lucky enough to already be in a healthy relationship, think of new ways to go out of your way. Show her even more love. Put the computer down and offer a back rub. Grab her a candy bar and rose while at the store. Little things – they all say a lot.
All of this leads to confident kids. You know those self-help books that teach patience, praise and encouragement as the keys to confidence? Well those books are certainly of merit but take care of mom first. By creating an atmosphere of ongoing love, your kids will gain the utmost of confidence and it will be instilled in them forever more.
There’s not a more beautiful woman to any child than mom. Make sure they know you feel that way to – and you’ll teach them what real love is all about while giving them a life-long confidence.